Musical Definitions:

topic posted Sun, February 5, 2006 - 5:46 AM by  Bobs
p - piano (soft) - the neighbours have complained

f - forte (loud) - the neighbouts are out

Crescendo - getting louder - testing the neighbours tollerance level

ff - fortissimo (VERY loud) - to hell with the neighbours

pp - pianissimo (VERY soft) - the neighbours are at the door

Dim - thick

Obbligato - being forced to practice

Rit (and/or) Rall - coming up to the bit you haven't practiced

Con moto - I have a car

Allegro - a little motor car

Maestro - a bigger motor car

Metronome - person small enough to fit comfortably into a Mini

Lento - the days leading up to Easto (with eggo and choco and things)

Largo - brewed in Germany (hence "Handel's Largo reaches parts other beers cannot reach")

Piu Animato - if you don't clean that rabbit out it will have to go

Interval - time to meet the players in the bar

Perfect Interval - when drinks are on the house

Cantabile - singing (that is, viz. drunk)

Con spirito - drunk again

Cantata - a fizzy drink

Tutti - ice cream

Coda - served with chipsa

Codetta - child's portion

Chords - things that organists play with one finger

Dischords - things that organists play with two fingers

Suspended chord - for lynching the soloist

Rubato - ointment for the musician's back

Subdominant - "I can't play until I've asked the wife"

Tonic - a pick-me-up

Syncopation - bowel contition brought on by an overdose of Jazz

Crotchet - knitting

Quaver - the feeling you get before a lesson when you haven't practiced

Key signatures - silly things put there to frighten you (ignore them - they will go away and so will your audience)

Time signatures - things for drummers to ignore

Colla voce - this shirt is so tight I can't talk

Professional - anyone who can't hold down a steady job

Flats - English apartments

A tempo - in time

A tempo de cafe - Ah, coffee time!

Improvisation - what you do when the music falls down

Fugue - clever stuff

Prelude - warm-up session before the clever stuff

Acciaccatura/appoggiatura - insects

Opus - exclamation made when Moggy has done a "whoopsie" on the carpet

Scales - fishy things

Trill - bird food

Virtuoso - someone who can work wonders with easy-play music

Antiphonal - crossed lines

Melody - an ancient and now extinct art in songwriting

Music - Happiness
posted by:
Bobs

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